A Midterm Crisis

Sorry I'm in this funk, but it has laregly to do with England, so though it is an emotional response (which I said I wouldn't cover in this blog, only to break that rule pretty early on), it's firmly grounded in England.

I'm having a midterm crisis. Spring break is coming, which means that there's not much sand left in my England hourglass, but enough to get something done. There are two countries left in the UK that I will have left to visit once spring break is over, if all goes according to plan, those being Wales and North Ireland. There is the mythical abroad-relationship I have yet to find, since no one will touch me (no pun intended) due to my expiration date. I want full-blown "the one that got away" romance, darn it, but no, no one wants to get attached and then have to end it in a number of months. Forget that noise, I want to be rendered utterly contrite and heartbroken when I leave England, I don't want it to be just another matter of consequence. I want romance (dare I say, love?) that makes me forget that I have an expiration date.

Oooh, deep. Maybe I'll revise that so it's not quite so completely and utterly emo.

This being cynical thing really isn't as fun as all the cynics I know crack it up to be.

Anyway, the point is that now is the point of brainstorming solutions to the problem, the problem being that I want to have an amazingly rewarding end to my Kenyon-Exeter experience, but what does that entail? A complete piss-up with random British people? Various tickets to Wales, North Ireland, the Czech Republic, France, Spain, Kosovo (A NEW COUNTRY, IN OUR LIFETIME, A SECOND VELVET REVOLUTION), Italy, Iona (an island off the coast of Scotland, not really a country but more of a destination. And there's no airport...)? Is it trips to London? Is it non-stop research? Or playwriting? Or exploring?

I guess this is the old "I never saw Paris" situation, except I'm not dying. I just probably won't ever be back to Europe, is all. And I have these fluctuations between sprees of action followed by collapses of inaction, the first being: what on earth can I do? Let me think of everything; and the second being: maybe the essence of England is just being here, and maybe having tea. I think this is the same reason why my room is always a mess: OOH! I could color code my entire bookshelf...but I still need to fold my clothes...oh well, none of it will ever get done, but the idea is what counts.

More on this crisis as it develops. But in the meantime:

halp.