Buttsecks?

So a bunch of my flatmates - several Mexican girls, three or four French girls, Thomas the Norwegian, Alice and one of her friends, who are ... Italian I think?, and then Stephanie Reiches and I, the two Americans - were playing "Never Have I Ever."

(On a tangent, there needs to be a venereal noun game for groups of people of a certain nationality. "A Freedom of Americans" or "A Souffle of French" or something.)

So we were playing "Never Have I Ever," which no one could really get down as a statement ("I have never never," or "I haven't ever ever" were some replacements.), and people had been saying things like "Never Have I Ever tried a cigarette," or "Never Have I Ever cheated on my boyfriend." And then it came to me.

So I posed the question to the group, "do you want this to be a dirty game of Never Have I Ever? Or do you not? Because I can make it dirty very quickly..."

And instantly everyone encouraged me to make it dirty. Little did they know ...

"Never," I asserted, "Have I Ever ... received buttsex."

A hush swept through the room.

"What is this 'buttsex'?" someone finally asked. Stephanie and I were already cracking up.

"Buttsex? Buttsex? It is, uh, how you say, buttsex?"

Instantly a flurry of translations and attempts at explanations in three or four different languages were shooting back and forth across the table. Some had misheard me, some thought I was saying "bad sex" and so, begrudgingly, were drinking. "SO-DOM-Y" I called out, but it pretty much was a cry in the wilderness.

Finally they caught the gist of it. "In British English, they say 'arse,' so it would be 'arse-sex'" one assured me. And they were all laughing, embarrassed, and some gave me a really bad look. But ALL of them were watching everyone else in the group like a hawk to see who would drink.


I also found a cat today and went on an adventure in Exeter, but these somehow pale in comparison to a bunch of Mexican and French girls sitting around a table saying the word "buttsex?" over and over and over again, vainly attempting to figure out what on earth it could be.